Lingua Citadel

I work for a small nonprofit theater company; a theater festival in the Hague (Den Haag), Netherlands, inexplicably invited members of our company to a festival they are putting on but all the senior members of my small theater company got lockjaw syndrome and painful-butt disease so by the luck of the draw I got [...]

Cy Preclops

—I haven’t had a drink since Saturday.
—It’s Wednesday.
—I know
—You sound like an alcoholic.
—I know. It still feels good not to drink. I’m going to keep going with it.
—Good! That’s good.
—Every time I make a proclamation like this I immediately undermine myself, but I sort of want to become totally straight-edge: no booze, no drugs, no [...]

Permanent Teardrop.

Hey Cancer
How’s “the darkness
Fine
Not as dark as you make it sound
Black beans and codfish
Shapeshifter rsvp’d.
Self-Zine?
Got fired Friday, can’t make it
Dog wearing lipstick?
Dunno,  she’s in heat, maybe spayed,  upset
really?
aye
listen
Fear-monger
canceled too. it’s just gonna be me you and self-zine
shapeshifter
And li’l caesar
The pizza guy

used to work for Men’s Wearhouse.
Hey whoww ofenn does your zine come out?
—Every other fortnight
does [...]

Eyeball Soup

There is a bowl of chili here.
Steam rises from its beans and meatflecks. It billows politely around a dollop of cold sour cream.
As you gaze into the stew, my face—the face of a young, obese Steven Spielberg, “replete” with undirty baseball cap and full Jewish hair fanning out from beneath the cap’s circumference—appears to you [...]

Where Is War-Weena?

—Internet’s quiet tonight
—Yep
—You said yer sleepy. Sure you wanna be bloggin?
—Don’t see why not. Got some language in my pan, might as well fry it up
—That don’t mean you necessarily have anything to say [easing off the fake southern accent outta self-consciousness]
—always got something to say. even when I don’t. I dig the “tale told [...]

“gravity’s pinned minions / ain’t that sweet”

Four new poems by Richard Parks in Snow Monkey. Love em. “Hey: what’s the Spanish for ‘ass curtain’?”
I really picked the wrong night last night to drink four beers smoke 40 fags and eat a suiza, man, sheesh! Why? Well, today I have to be in 1980s businesswoman drag all day, for work—shoulder-pads, heels, thigh-cut [...]

Conceit 2.0

I think I wrote this two nights ago. When people start going to therapy, it’s all they can talk about. I’m not paying anyone to listen to me talk about myself right now. Well, occasionally I buy people beers and then talk about myself. I ply folks with “blue” American Spirits. But no therapy.

PEDRO VALLEYWHISTLE: [...]

heartbroken fatsuit

CHARLES CHUBINKSI: You look fantastic in that sweater.
LORI TREVANIAN: I know.
[They are both hungover and in love. Their relationship is broken.]
LORI: I’m starving.
CC: I know.
[She's better than he is. More attractive, more "vital life force." He's a neurotic dump.]
LORI: I love you.
CHARLES: Nah, you don’t. I mean, you won’t. After we’ve been broken up for [...]

Beatrix and the Double-Frog

BEATRIX POTTER MASK: This pace is good. Try to keep up this pace, OK?
DOUBLE-FROG: Okay.
BPM: You’re tired today.
DF: Yeah.
BPM: What’s up?
DF: Dunno. Got foal-legs again.
BPM: But why?
DF: Sleep sked’s outta whack.
BPM: Trouble concentrating?
DF: That’s more of a terminal problem. That’s chronic for me. But yes, more than normal today.
BPM: Do you feel guilty?
DF: Do you [...]

Gloaming {the Cube}

TED BILLIONS: I know you’re burned out, Leland. Hang in there
LELAND: Fuck this. Fuck you.
TED: You are a very privileged person. You’re looking a gift horse in the mouf
LELAND: And you’re looking a gift horse in its butt. Parry! Thrust!
TED: I’m wounded. You’ll pay for this
LELAND: What part of me gives you the sense that [...]