—I haven’t had a drink since Saturday.
—It’s Wednesday.
—I know
—You sound like an alcoholic.
—I know. It still feels good not to drink. I’m going to keep going with it.
—Good! That’s good.
—Every time I make a proclamation like this I immediately undermine myself, but I sort of want to become totally straight-edge: no booze, no drugs, no [...]
Entries Tagged as ‘MAD DRAMA’
November 4, 2009
Cy Preclops
October 11, 2009
Paging Dr. Gary
Another hot slice of Audi-0 embarrassment for you, my friends. Sunday 9 a.m. oficina multi-tracked GarageBand depression. Oh Charley Charley Charley.
The sound of a Sanford Uniball FINE repeatedly clinked against an empty ceramic mug is not a substitute for the digital hi-hat of the 808, and for that I’m sorry. As ever, this is [...]
September 26, 2009
Full-Scale Erotica
—Intelligence has nothing to do with it.
—Then what’s it about?
—Whether or not you’re right.
—How’s that determined?
—History? I don’t know. Sex?
—Sex tells you whether or not you’re right?
—If you’re having good sex, nice sex, successful sex with someone, then you’re right.
—”Well, you’re doing something right.”
—Exactly.
—You were also saying something about sex addicts.
—The [scholarly name for the [...]
September 1, 2009
Gloaming {the Cube}
TED BILLIONS: I know you’re burned out, Leland. Hang in there
LELAND: Fuck this. Fuck you.
TED: You are a very privileged person. You’re looking a gift horse in the mouf
LELAND: And you’re looking a gift horse in its butt. Parry! Thrust!
TED: I’m wounded. You’ll pay for this
LELAND: What part of me gives you the sense that [...]
August 27, 2009
CV
My work has appeart in Shit Furnace, Papal Nutsheath, The Crow’s Li’l Quarterly, Preen, Lobestone, Nepali Ice Review, Pindelyboz, Jamiroquai, Text of Whispers, bu*lsh*t, Webslingazz, Postal Mouth, The Meal, Ripyarns, Cambridge and You, Frowncake, Busty Feminist Review, Clamhouse, Ars Poetica, Hayden’s Ferry Review, McSweeney’s, Fence, BOMB, The Paris Review, Open City, The Quarterly, Genesis West, [...]
August 22, 2009
funny riff
Hey wait stop cmere don’t wait no stop hey cmere wait hey stop hey wait cmere cmon no here ha stop wait stop hey hi ha huh cmon uh here ha nah ha huh nuh heh wait stop no ha huh heh wait well hic stop hic ha wait ow ouch wait don’t wow wait [...]
August 14, 2009
Ink Death
A little ten-year-old dude and his dad are sitting in an urban park. There’s a fountain, people of different ethnicities. A spinster takes a decade to unwrap a sandwich. A man wearing sunglasses smokes a “peener,” which is a tiny marijuana cigarette. The boy’s name is Travis. The dad’s just Dad.
TRAVIS: Dad, this is a [...]
August 13, 2009
Brainstorming Session
SHANNON: Maybe we should have called this a barn-storming session!
[General laughter.]
SHANNON: [Cont] No but really, Jacob, you haven’t been updating the admin site, and we’ve all fallen behind because of your laziness. What’s been going on?
JACOB: Well, I stopped being a vegetarian, and it’s really thrown my digestion for a loop. I also started smoking [...]
August 10, 2009
Hate: The Musical
A man sits at a desk, typing into a terminal. He refers intermittently to a document that rests peacefully on the desk. This man is overweight, glasses, bad posture, dumb t-shirt, khaki jeans. Bad haircut, bloodshot eyes, some chocolate from a York Peppermint Patty smeared on his forearm.
A 2nd dude enters and approaches the [...]
July 29, 2009
Against Film Crews
Hey Thank You The Rumpus and Stephen Elliott Enterprises For Giving This Webiste Another Vote of Confidence! Welcome, Subsistence Farmers! (??)
/li>
There was a film crew setting up on Valencia & 20th st this morning, 9:30ish. It provoked immediate resentment, does every time. Not sure why. [Notes: Obese Tom Stoppardesque/Wildean artist/novelist/writer envisions a scene for his [...]